“Myexcellentfatherdiedaboutfiveyearsago;andhisattachmenttoMr.Wickhamwastothelastsosteady,thatinhiswillheparticularlyrecommendedittome,topromotehisadvancementinthebestmannerthathisprofessionmightallow—andifhetookorders,desiredthatavaluablefamilylivingmightbehisassoonasitbecamevacant.Therewasalsoalegacyofonethousandpounds.Hisownfatherdidnotlongsurvivemine,andwithinhalfayearfromtheseevents,Mr.Wickhamwrotetoinformmethat,havingfinallyresolvedagainsttakingorders,hehopedIshouldnotthinkitunreasonableforhimtoexpectsomemoreimmediatepecuniaryadvantage,inlieuofthepreferment,bywhichhecouldnotbebenefited.Hehadsomeintention,headded,ofstudyingthelaw,andImustbeawarethattheinterestofonethousandpoundswouldbeaveryinsufficientsupporttherein.Iratherwished,thanbelievedhimtobesincere;but,atanyrate,wasperfectlyreadytoaccedetohisproposal.IknewthatMr.Wickhamoughtnottobeaclergyman;thebusinesswasthereforesoonsettled—heresignedallclaimtoassistanceinthechurch,wereitpossiblethathecouldeverbeinasituationtoreceiveit,andacceptedinreturnthreethousandpounds.Allconnectionbetweenusseemednowdissolved.IthoughttooillofhimtoinvitehimtoPemberley,oradmithissocietyintown.IntownIbelievehechieflylived,buthisstudyingthelawwasamerepretence,andbeingnowfreefromallrestraint,hislifewasalifeofidlenessanddissipation.ForaboutthreeyearsIheardlittleofhim;butonthedeceaseoftheincumbentofthelivingwhichhadbeendesignedforhim,heappliedtomeagainbyletterforthepresentation.Hiscircumstances,heassuredme,andIhadnodifficultyinbelievingit,wereexceedinglybad.Hehadfoundthelawamostunprofitablestudy,andwasnowabsolutelyresolvedonbeingordained,ifIwouldpresenthimtothelivinginquestion—ofwhichhetrustedtherecouldbelittledoubt,ashewaswellassuredthatIhadnootherpersontoprovidefor,andIcouldnothaveforgottenmyreveredfathersintentions.Youwillhardlyblamemeforrefusingtocomplywiththisentreaty,orforresistingeveryrepetitiontoit.Hisresentmentwasinproportiontothedistressofhiscircumstances—andhewasdoubtlessasviolentinhisabuseofmetoothersasinhisreproachestomyself.Afterthisperiodeveryappearanceofacquaintancewasdropped.HowhelivedIknownot.Butlastsummerhewasagainmostpainfullyobtrudedonmynotice.
“ImustnowmentionacircumstancewhichIwouldwishtoforgetmyself,andwhichnoobligationlessthanthepresentshouldinducemetounfoldtoanyhumanbeing.Havingsaidthusmuch,Ifeelnodoubtofyoursecrecy.Mysister,whoismorethantenyearsmyjunior,waslefttotheguardianshipofmymothersnephew,ColonelFitzwilliam,andmyself.Aboutayearago,shewastakenfromschool,andanestablishmentformedforherinLondon;andlastsummershewentwiththeladywhopresidedoverit,toRamsgate;andthitheralsowentMr.Wickham,undoubtedlybydesign;forthereprovedtohavebeenaprioracquaintancebetweenhimandMrs.Younge,inwhosecharacterweweremostunhappilydeceived;andbyherconnivanceandaid,hesofarrecommendedhimselftoGeorgiana,whoseaffectionateheartretainedastrongimpressionofhiskindnesstoherasachild,thatshewaspersuadedtobelieveherselfinlove,andtoconsenttoanelopement.Shewasthenbutfifteen,whichmustbeherexcuse;andafterstatingherimprudence,Iamhappytoadd,thatIowedtheknowledgeofittoherself.Ijoinedthemunexpectedlyadayortwobeforetheintendedelopement,andthenGeorgiana,unabletosupporttheideaofgrievingandoffendingabrotherwhomshealmostlookeduptoasafather,acknowledgedthewholetome.YoumayimaginewhatIfeltandhowIacted.Regardformysisterscreditandfeelingspreventedanypublicexposure;butIwrotetoMr.Wickham,wholefttheplaceimmediately,andMrs.Youngewasofcourseremovedfromhercharge.Mr.Wickhamschiefobjectwasunquestionablymysistersfortune,whichisthirtythousandpounds;butIcannothelpsupposingthatthehopeofrevenginghimselfonmewasastronginducement.Hisrevengewouldhavebeencompleteindeed.
“This,madam,isafaithfulnarrativeofeveryeventinwhichwehavebeenconcernedtogether;andifyoudonotabsolutelyrejectitasfalse,youwill,Ihope,acquitmehenceforthofcrueltytowardsMr.WickhaIknownotinwhatmanner,underwhatformoffalsehoodhehadimposedonyou;buthissuccessisnotperhapstobewonderedat.Ignorantasyoupreviouslywereofeverythingconcerningeither,detectioncouldnotbeinyourpower,andsuspicioncertainlynotinyourinclination.
“Youmaypossiblywonderwhyallthiswasnottoldyoulastnight;butIwasnotthenmasterenoughofmyselftoknowwhatcouldoroughttoberevealed.Forthetruthofeverythinghererelated,IcanappealmoreparticularlytothetestimonyofColonelFitzwilliam,who,fromournearrelationshipandconstantintimacy,and,stillmore,asoneoftheexecutorsofmyfatherswill,hasbeenunavoidablyacquaintedwitheveryparticularofthesetransactions.Ifyourabhorrenceofmeshouldmakemyassertionsvalueless,youcannotbepreventedbythesamecausefromconfidinginmycousin;andthattheremaybethepossibilityofconsultinghim,Ishallendeavourtofindsomeopportunityofputtingthisletterinyourhandsinthecourseofthemorning.Iwillonlyadd,Godblessyou.
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